My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
i just saw a woman using her birth control packet as a wallet.
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
I've decided I'm either going to ease him into this breakup by having a threesome with him and the girl I'm leaving him for, or be brutal and fuck his room mate. it depends how nice he is tonight.
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
Apparently I got mad at you for "Not drinking with me till we thought we were seahorses" and smashed my face on your door. Then I put my feet in the oven and started crying because I was drinking alcohol from a pot. My life is spinning out of control.
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
Also, my guy said they would be around. And i clarified that when I asked him for mushrooms he didn't hear "a mushroom or two" but rather understood I meant "all the mushrooms you can find between now and 4th of July."
What happened last night? I just woke up and there's like 15 mcflurry cups on the floor
You don't remember stealing them?
Why are you hurting?
Tried to drink all the beer in Nashville last night....failed.
What are you doing tomorrow?
Dude its my bday. Im drinking from sunup til face down. Rinse and repeat.
Randomize