I found your undies. They were wrapped around my leg.
help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
I feel like a squirrel prepping for the winter on dollar beer nights.
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
My liver just had a heart attack.
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
2:23 am. Im just at McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, paying in nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
2:26 am. Im just being thrown out of McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, without my nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
Pretty good. They took the stitches out but it still hurts like a bitch. The doctor says I should be off crutches by next week.
Well, that's good. Let's hope drunk you doesn't sabotage you.
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
