his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
shouldve known this week was gonna be bad when I threw up in my coffee mug
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
The EMTs said they would give me as many blankets as I wanted if I didn't pee in the ambulance. They even turned on the sirens.
you came out with your cock in between the legs of a balloon animal. Maybe she'll think you have a sense of humor.
What kind of balloon animal was it?
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
I just got a lap dance from a sexy cop in return for giving him his sunglasses back. I think this is going to be the beginning of a really great friendship
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
You then played what you called "a smooth jazz rendition of talk dirty to me" all thrusting your crotch at the bartender. Mom looked horrified, but my dad couldn't stop laughing
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
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