Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
I woke up with a massive hangover and realized I still had an entire bottle of tequila in my car...so yeah, working on tomorrow's hangover.
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
My card got declined when I tried to buy dippin dots at 2 am, the lady gave them to me for free because "I looked like I needed them."
We can only continue to use the "oh what's the difference between circumcised and uncircumcised" for a few more months before people will see through our lies
Dude, I'm at a wedding and there's a mashed potato bar and bacon strip appetizers. I'm getting all emotional.
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
Randomize
