dude I went to cubs game with my mustache, aviators, and a hooded sweatshirt. Do you think it was irony or fate that there were four 17 year old girls in front of us?
your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
Hes sobering up now. He was just really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while he was telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together..
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
You left me with 12 red bulls and a bottle of vodka. What did you expect?
Randomize
