So he says "lean over this" which is a chain across the doorway, held into the wall with bolts. I do. Then he puts his weight on top of me to try and get it in.
It breaks. We fall.
I now have a broken nose, a concussion, and an infected, split lip. Why do I have the worst luck in guys?
we got so high we spray painted his girlfriend's UGG boots. she's CRYING. it's hysterical.
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
So I wake up to my ex girlfriends underwear hanging from the ceiling fan and the only thing i can think of is "what time is the game"
there is another microwave in the elevator.
Randomize
