Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
he just asked me to email him a handle of captain morgans...how sober do you think he is?
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
if i dont text back till morning its cause i turned my phone off and changed my password to something i wont remember to stop myself from drunk texting...RESPONSIBILITY
I'm adopting to save the world from the moral outrage that would be my offspring
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.
You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it
Oh god I just had an orgasim riding my bike. I need to get laid pronto.
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