Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
you know what scares the shit out of me? i have eaten bagel bites since i was a little kid and just in the past five years they started puting "made with real cheese" WHAT THE FUCK WERE THEY USING BEFORE? i mean ive been a bagel biter since the womb
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
Then you shook your fists at the sky and explained to us that losing a sneeze is like losing an orgasm
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
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