at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
I heard some girl say 'yeah he mustve been so drunk he kept mumbling and repeating himself'
And I thought
Fuck I do that shit every weekend
just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
The amount of my urine my roommate has consumed after I found out he's been eating my food almost offsets how angry I am
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
Why can't burritos get me drunk
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
Your ex roommate is making out w the kid who pees on floors and it's kinda funny
Randomize