I'm gonna have bed sores at the end of this hangover.
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
He's 30 years old and woke me up for a hand job. Last time I go home with someone I met through Tinder.
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
Fuck you. Fuck this party. I just wanted to be pretty with a cute little tiara and boys sucking my tits, now i have a hangman game drawn on my face and jello shots in my hair.
I wanted to give you a great birthday party. You know I did.
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
Gameplan: If the cops show up, find a potted plant to hide behind... It's worked before!
Randomize
