vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
I drank a girls breast milk at this wedding. Shit was next level
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
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