After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
i was having this nice romantic moment with my girlfriend. then jimmy came in and peed on the fridge
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
Only once have I found myself in the condom aisle holding a bundt cake...
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
I woke up to a full mcdonalds meal being shoved in my face. Mom mustve noticed the empty tequila bottle. I love family.
And then you told me I had large hands and looked like a girl who would have an illegitimate child that I never talked about
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
If my bootycall doesn't bring over a Baconnator, I swear to fucking God, I'm not letting him in. The hunger is that real. Forget his Persian dick.
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
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