Your face is a jimmy john
it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
Got a traffic ticket on the way home.. Literally cost me $171 to give him a blowjob. I swear the officer could smell the cum in my hair.
I found a video of myself completely naked on my phone giving a drunk tutorial on how to shit properly while blindfolded. Did you record it?
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
There is a goat eating lettuce out of our fridge. Do you wanna grab a bloody mary?
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
Randomize
