Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
Why hello there Olivia! How are you today on this fine and most wonderful morning full of magic and adventure and awesomeness?
Someone just got laid.
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
Your uterus is safe from my father's misconstrued prophecies.
He wanted to watch a Charlie Brown thanksgiving. But I was like, fuck that, I'm a grown up. So we watched jumanji and I sucked his dick.
Do you think he will let me wear my neck fan while he throws my back out?
Please shut the fuck up.
Randomize
