I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
Do u think I can claim pregnancy as an accident so my insurance covers it?
when im not freaking out about dying alone and unloved, i actually really enjoy being single
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
If I don't at least start a parade that spirals into drunken riots then I'm calling it a fail of a birthday
I took 20 bucks from you because when I woke up I saw more of you than I ever wanted to see bro.
Totally acceptable.
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
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