do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
Just found a hundred dollar bill on the ground. Hope you're looking to drink tonight
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
they're like a gay fantastic four
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
I was just shot with a dart gun by one of my coworkers while walking to the printer. Ironically I was printing my resignation letter...
I forgot drug dealers have families, too. Cheers to a sober, uncomfortable, slightly enraging Thanksgiving.
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
Oh, now I remember why I deleted your number. You're kind of a dick. Please delete mine.
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