omh. i just found SHIT IN THE SHOWER! who the fuck does that? and why do i always seem to find it?
I am sleeping on the floor in your room so if you have sex in here just don't roll on me
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
Don't bother coming over to clean the mess. I already paid two kids 5 bucks for it, just didn't tell them you peed all over the place. You do owe me 5 bucks though
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
I swear, the cow we tried to tip tried to eat me. and all I could think was, oh how the tables have turned. worst trip ever
All I need is a morbidly obese man masturbating at the other end of the car and I'll complete the CTA Horror Trifecta.
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
Have you ever seen death before? Bc it's me right now in yesterday's clothes.
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
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