There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
im pretty sure you tried to fart so bad you accidently pissed your pants at my party.
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
Couldn't get it up. She asked me what she was doing wrong. Didn't have the heart to tell her. I appreciated her willingness to adapt, but she's pretty much gonna look that bad her whole life.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
All I wanted was a quiet evening to masturbate and eat cake and instead you ruined it by bringing girls over.
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
Febreezed myself at a stop light on the way to the IRS office. Judgmental glare from some old lady in the car next to me, thumbs up from her husband.
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
Randomize
