she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
Heard it's your birthday. I can't send pictures, but go ahead and imagine my balls.
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
You called me at 4am shouting drunk shit about Poland and asking me to 'come out and play.' Where the fuck were you?
Poland
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
I'm all about clean living these days
You started your day with fried chicken and a bloody
... after you woke up in your own urine
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
Randomize
