i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
the cop didnt laugh with me when he patted me down and pulled out my flask.
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
You kept mumbling that you could become one with the carpet as you proceeded to give yourself the worst carpet burn I have ever seen
My mom was looking at curtains for me and sent pictures and I had to be like "not the Disney princess pink and purple, more like an acid trip"
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
Randomize
