im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
Condoms? Check. Glitter? Check. Fuck me pumps? Double check. Dignity? No where to be found. I'm about to homewreck the shit out of that dumb bitch.
I've been meaning to talk to you about your lack of self-respect these days and the toll it's taking on your vagina.
i just practiced my bj skills on a banana in front of the mirror
its going to be a good night
i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
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