You should come over. I am making a celebratory I got laid by a huge penis cake.
Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
Putting all my energy Into finding a polite way to ask my mailman to fuck me in his car.
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
Randomize
