Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
Babe! I just farted and I swear to jesus lord christ that it sounded like ur name! Ok, more like Meeatt but still... awesome.
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
my mom said i couldn't bring cigarettes cause it was a family trip, which was really irresponsible of her because now i have to walk around the beach drunk trying to find someone with cigarettes.
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
Woke up the day after the party with a bruise on my stomach. Pretty sure my liver was trying to escape for fear of it's life.
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
Happiness is laying in bed, topless, pouring 4 packs of hot sauce on your taco bell.
Randomize