The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
A cute girl just told me she forgot to take her birth control and winked... I've never been so conflicted about fleeing in terror
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
Dude, the T Swift concert might not be so bad after all. Can you say milfs living vicariously through their teenage daughters? Score.
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
Randomize
