Why are you at a bar in Connecticut?
Long story. One that now involves lots of delicious chicken wings om nom nom
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
Apparently as she was dragging me out of the club, I was clinching onto this european guy screaming at Jenna: that's the 12th time you've cockblocked me tonight
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
I did it again.
I drunk texted John McCain.
How do I tell this guy that if he does not like the condoms at my apartment, he should bring his own without sounding like a sure thing?
Say it's BYOC night at the beach. And, you are a sure thing. Own it.
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
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