you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
There's a knife in my toilet. And I meant to ask you last night if you got a hair cut?
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
i feel like the girl with kaleidoscope eyes except the kaleidoscopes are sparkly butt plugs
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
Randomize
