I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
She just sent me a txt where every word ended in "zzz", with about a hundred "!!!" and called herself "juicezzz". I need back up.
this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
im in class. still drunk. wearing one sock. eating a breakfast sandwich and trying to make sure this bottle of whiskey doesnt fall out of my purse in front of my professor
I wish a night of watching Dear John and a bottle of wine could cure my herpes.
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
Randomize
