Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
You should come over. I am making a celebratory I got laid by a huge penis cake.
I just woke up in a puddle of boob sweat. Definitely time to consider a reduction.
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
Randomize
