How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
just bailed mom out of jail. Tell me i'm not the favorite child
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
He bought me pizza and bourbon and played scrabble with me. So naturally I slept with him.
Randomize
