I printed and framed a picture of a seagull shitting, and hung it in my house. I'm waiting to see how long it takes everyone to notice.
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
No subtext here. People are naked.
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
Don’t drink the Bloody Mary - it’s vodka and salsa.
Randomize
