Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
There's a big bag of salt and vinegar chips and a Budweiser for when you wake up. Don't say I never did anything for you.
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
"I played a game called "how drunk can you get in a minute" last night. How was your Thursday?"
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
I RAN OVER A NUN! I RAN OVER A FUCKING NUN! GOD WILL NEVER FORGIVE ME FOR MY SINS NOW!!!
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize
