I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
my mom just called and warned me someone is trying to serve me, i feel like i'm playing an extreme game of hide and go seek these next weeks
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea.
So the bitch asked me if I wanted the name brand or the generic contraceptive. Does it look like I want to be generically pregnant?
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
What exactly do I say to a random stoner hookup to thank him for ending my dry spell? Is it awkward to just say "Thanks for that. It was well needed."
I'm gonna snort this pill I found on the ground cause that's how classy I am. Watch football and eat Beef jerky. Domesticated at its finest.
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
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