I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
She called my landing strip a "vagina mohawk"....
Lesbians are weird.
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
Just high enough for therapy.
In other news there is a guy at my office who I'm pretty sure will be wearing someone's skin as a coat one day.
I don't want to flatter myself but after the way he was looking at me today I think it might be me.
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
Randomize
