I didn't shave. On purpose
...there is blood under my fingernails.
...I hope my roomates are okay.
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
ok so I'm texting you now like I promised instead of drunktexting aaron and telling him how badly I want his cock tonight. aren't you proud?
this is Aaron, hi
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
After a couple hours you decided you were going to walk home but ten minutes later you called and said you'd puked by the side of the road and you needed us to drive you to the art museum.
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
Got upgraded to First Class and now I’ve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
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