I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
You tried to call the hospital and left a voicemail asking if you could be put on the liver transplant list as a "pre-caution"
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
Bro... You handed me an ice cube from your drink and said "tell me if it tastes like pickles".
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
Randomize
