If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
Stuck behind a lady in her 70's purchasing a plastic handle of vodka and nothing else. She is writing a check. Hello future.
My boss just gave me full permission to come into work wasted this weekend.
The cab driver referred to me as his little gumdrop, im sure he won't feel the same when he sees the vomit all over his floor.
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
If the fate of the world hinged on some chubby girl getting laid, the president would dispatch me with a fifth of Jameson immediately and then rest easy.
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
Anal on new furniture sounds like a quickest way to violate a warranty
he's annoying when i'm sober but vaguely hot when i'm drunk so yes i do have a preference and it goes by the name of vodka
Randomize
