i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
So I think I just got a job offer from the guy I used to blow. See, networking pays off.
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
Ok in all seriousness. Alcohol intake is now restricted for me. I found handcuffs in my trunk.
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
Please come and kill me with a brick you dont even have to be nice about it just smash myfucking skull in this is the worst hangover ive had for at least a week
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
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