Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
Can we talk about how i drunkenly changed the timezone on my phone last night and just showed up to work an hour early
It's time you knew: I have been dating your probation officer for 7 months. Pretty certain he's THE ONE. So, thanks for being a criminal.
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