Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
Is it appropriate to put "Mommy and Daddys shitfaced-ness that led to Aubrey" on a birth announcement?
Well you two just had a kid in the middle of college, I dont think anyone will notice.
Thanks bro
Some clips from last night: grinded like I haven't since college. Took shots with a bartender with a bad ass mustache. Made up a string of lies with fake names and occupations. Slept behind the couch with pizza in my hand
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
we were the definition of too high: argued for 10 minutes about who was gonna get the condom (it was 2 feet away on the night stand) and past out watching adventure time.
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.
I ran into the kitchen halfway through hooking up cause I forgot I put the cookies on the oven too high. Came back and she was gone but the only thing I could think about was all the extra cookies I could eat now. Got through about 6 before I realized why she left.
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
The date did not go well. Turns out I once set her brother on fire.
He is a real estate investor who’s face I’m going to sit on.
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
Randomize
