I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
i just googled "alcohol delivery service". im combating drunk driving one lazy act a time.
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
If youre wondering about the smell, i set your hamster on fire. But don't worry he's ok
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
Yoga may not b such a good idea for me today. My liver is obviously in cahoots with my colon to pay me back for the past 24 days of misuse . Downward dog could have catastrophic consequences.
I cunt my lip shaving. That's not a typo, it's a placement clue
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
THE SUPER HOT BARTENDER WHO LOOKS LIKE RYAN GOSLING JUST WALKED IN. BUT HE DOESNT EVEN WALK HE GLIDES. LIKE AN ANGEL.
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
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