i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
Awesome, the library of congress archived all tweets. Now my great great grandchildren can pinpoint the date they inherited alcoholism.
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
I'd cum for enchiladas.
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
I think I gotta smoke less weed, I'm getting to lazy to fuck my girlfriend
I really wanted you to make me eggs this afternoon. I even wrote it on my hand to remind myself.
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
Randomize