I want to have your abortion
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
I just swiped right for a guy on Tinder solely because it looked like he was holding Zoboomafoo
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
Randomize
