it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
Everyone at work loved my story about sobering up in a river with no bra on.
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower.
Next. Level. Shit.
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
Randomize
