I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
I can hear my liver begging me not to go out tonight
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
I'm going to knit you a pair of furry handcuffs. And you said that knitting class was dumb.
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
I really hope jumping jacks prevent pregancy because I'm kind of banking on it right now, do you know why there's a unicycle in the corner of my room?
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
A cute girl just told me she forgot to take her birth control and winked... I've never been so conflicted about fleeing in terror
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
From now on, you must never doubt my ability to go from drunken rambling lovesick girl to Stepford wife within the course of a few hours.
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
Randomize
