Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did
I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
I just found him singing into an empty paper towel roll while microwaving an empty ice cream carton. I'm gonna run away now.
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
Hey do you have a way to post bail? If not we can hook you up. If a police officer is reading this please ask him and respond in a timely fashion. I am concerned for my imprisoned friend
He told me my butthole was like "Narnia" and that it's a wonderful place he would like to visit.
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
Randomize
