sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
Apparently I send drunk snapchats a lot and they always have random dudes in them. Like one night it was just me and some guy I don't know sitting on my couch.
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
you went to ralph's and bought all of their pears and left them outside my house
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
He once bought a dildo and put fifty dollars and a happy anniversary note in the battery compartment I gotta lock him down while hes available
You walked around in your costume going up to every guy saying "I'm a squirrel, give me your nuts"
Randomize
