if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
I swear every time I make the effort to make my hair look nice, someone jizzes in it.
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
Come to my pity party. It's being hosted in my basement. The theme is ambiguously sexual cuddling and wine.
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
There is absolutely a 0% chance my hips will make it out of this twerking business fully functional
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
I just remembered that I totally burped into someones mouth when we were making out. I was really smooth about it so he didn't notice.
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
Randomize
