I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
he told me my vagina needed a tic tac
if i wake up one more time on my porch im gonna start considering myself homeless
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
I asked him if his doormat had a name, then proceeded to sit on it for the next 30 minutes while signing that magic carpet ride song from aladdin.
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
just used my amazon order history to figure out my anniversary. I am the most epic/shittiest bf ever...
also somebody did cough syrup and i was really worried but i couldn’t express why properly so i was like MACKLEMORE SAYS NO
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
Randomize
