She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
Growing a beard is gonna make smoking a pipe look so much more majestic
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
You may have gone on a date, but I ate chicken nuggets shaped like dinosaurs for dinner tonight. I think we both know who the real winner is here.
That's a beautiful sentiment.
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
Never let your siblings swipe right.
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
Randomize
