Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
When I told my boss I'm using a vacation day for 4/20, he gave me his personal cell phone number and winked at me.
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
I'm not asking you to commit. I'm politely asking your penis to be my friend.
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
If my bootycall doesn't bring over a Baconnator, I swear to fucking God, I'm not letting him in. The hunger is that real. Forget his Persian dick.
So when's a good time this week to show up at your apartment in nothing but a trench coat and a bow? Y'know. Hypothetically.
Dude i'm still drunk and i'm feeding a raccoon cereal from my bedroom window
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
I need you to get the emergency bail money out if the stuffed panda and go to the police station tot bail me out. I should be there in 20 minutes.
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
Randomize
